What’s Worse?

I recently found out that two acquaintances of mine both recently lost their jobs.

One was making OK money and lives close to paycheck-to-paycheck, while the other was making BANK and enjoys all the luxuries that come with that.

Now they’re both pretty stressed out about it, but one recently made an off-hand comment that the other will be having a much harder time dealing with it and feels his situation is much better. (They both know each other)

Wanna take a stab at which person said it? 🙂 Friend A with less money but smaller expenses, or Friend B with a bigger income and inflated expenses?

You can probably guess having read this blog for a while, but it was Friend A – the one with less money! Which of course at first glance wouldn’t make sense – why would someone living paycheck-to-paycheck have an easier time with a job loss than someone making much more? – but as we all know, your *expected lifestyle* tends to play a much larger role emotionally than your state of finances.

Friend A is used to skimping by and has thus learned to craft a decent life around it (his actual words to me were “I’m used to living poor”), while Friend B, aka Mr. MoneyBags, is now used to a more high-flying life and will  have to figure out how to reign it all in now to sustain this lifestyle of his.

Of course, Friend B in theory should have much more stashed away and plenty of areas he could downsize in a pinch (the house, the cars, the “toys”), but again the emotional toll on it might be harder to swallow than the financial side – even if just temporarily. I’d also have to imagine it’s much harder to replace a high-paying job of that caliber than an entry-level one too?  So the strain could last quite longer for him than Friend A as well. So long, at least, as Friend A can still keep the lights on and food in the fridge!

Now, it’s entirely possible that we’re ALL wrong here, and Friend A just made the comment to make himself feel better because in either situation it blows! 😂 And now here we’ve got this blog post being published to thousands of people around the world dissecting a dilemma that none of us knows anything about, lol… (Which doesn’t stop it from still being fun, of course ;))

In either case, it’s interesting to ponder, and regardless of what side you find yourself on it’s good to KNOW YOURSELF first before one day maybe finding yourself in a similar position scrambling… As we all know, there is more to wealth than income, and the expenses side is a VERY large part of that. The lower expenses you have, the less you need to make and the quicker you get to FIRE! It’s not just about the income, gotta keep ALL the bases in check!

elmo on fire

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In other news…. *awkward transition*

Happy summer!! I hope y’all are living your Best Lives and enjoying some good time w/ your kiddos if you have any! (Sanity, that is, hah!).

That’s what I’ve been doing here lately, and thus my absence over the past few months…

I think last we connected I was starting my journey taking over grocery shopping, and while I’m still far from being a pro yet, I am proud to say it’s still going strong and everyone has food to eat every night 😁  Though I’ll admit I still pick up more things than I’d like based on *convenience* rather than *price*. But maybe that’s OK now that I don’t have to watch every penny anymore? The perks of being good with your money for so many years?

Speaking of which, this blog turned 15 this year and I totally missed it! 15 years – crazy!!! Is anyone still here from the start of it? Or even the bulk of it, like when I used to call myself J. Savings???! Hahaha…. It’s wild looking back at all the changes in both the blog and my life the past decade and a half, but it’s cool we’re still here and hopefully at least a tinee bit wiser 🙂 I love that y’all still pop in and say hi so we stay connected over the years – I hope you continue to do that! Friends for life, please!!

internet high five

I’ve also been very much enjoying my volunteer work and starting to see it as a 2nd calling. After months of experimenting and figuring out “my place” with it all, I’ve finally carved out a nice position for myself at a local homeless shelter focusing on keeping everyone nice and clothed. Which in itself is pretty valuable, of course – clothes are important! – but I’m realizing more and more that it’s not just the *stuff* we help the unhoused with, but moreso it’s about letting them know they are respected and *SEEN*.

The other day I merely asked someone how they were doing, and their exact response back to me was, “It’s nice to hear voices.” That really hit me 🙁 So many people are hidden away from society just trying to survive (and not get arrested!) so when they make the trek into our place they get to be “normal” again and surrounded by a community who values them. I think I genuinely now have about 7 new people I call a friend, and while some days are harder than others, it’s been an incredible journey so far.

And in that same vein of “being seen,” people also want to look and FEEL good too! Sure they’ll take anything that’s dry and fits them well, but man do they love CHOICE when given the option. Just as we do. They each have their own fashion style and will clamour for items that fit that as soon as they come into the door 🙂 Last week I brought in a pair of Vans and some skinny jeans and they were taken out of my hands before I even PUT THEM DOWN on the shelves! It actually makes me want to set up some sort of fashion show or something where they can all dress up and strut down the runway rocking their styles as some sort of charity event. But I still don’t know enough about what’s “appropriate” and what’s not there yet so for now I just save my ideas to myself…

I’ve also learned how GENEROUS people are with their time and donations (some of the stuff people donate is nicer than anything I own!!) and also how everyone needs *belts* but they’re some of the hardest things to come by! So much so that the homeless end up just stripping the laces off the donated shoes and crafting their own makeshift belts right there on the spot… I see it at least twice a week, and that’s only on MY shifts! Such a simple – and cheap thing – a belt, but man can they be valuable…

(Speaking of shifts – my thesis on being able to come and go as you please once an organization knows you more def. stands true! I play nice and go through their system more or less each week, but I also just pop in and out when I feel like it too which as you know is my ultimate preference. Especially when you have kids in and out of camps all summer long!)

So needless to say, I’ve been getting more joy volunteering now than just sitting at the coffee shops or doing puzzles all day long, lol… so Phase I of being WifeFI’d is officially over, and now we enter a new one of more productiveness and purpose 😉

Now tell me what you guys have been up to! Anyone else getting into life changing things over there? Or perhaps some fun projects or vacations this summer?

My kids joined the swim team for the first time ever so we’ve basically been living at the pool when we’re all together 😉 A whole other experience that I’ll save for another day, though I will say it’s finally nice to show off my tattoos as the only time they see the light of day is when my shirt is off, haha… So that’s something.

Okay bye for now.


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